Radical Unionist commentator and former Blanket columnist Dr John Coulter comes from an evangelical Christian background. But in this latest article for The Pensive Quill he fires a shot across the bows of mainstream Christian Churches in Ireland for not doing enough to combat what he calls 'The Magaluf Madness.' A shorter version of this column appeared in the Irish Daily Star on 11th August, 2014. 

The scourge of the Magaluf Madness can only be cured by Ireland’s Christian Churches getting off their asses and into the communities they are supposed to serve.

Social media footage of an Irish girl allegedly performing oral sex on up to two dozen males in the sunspot has gone viral. 

Hardly a week goes by that social media does not unveil equally shocking images of sex romps at drink and drug-fuelled binges, yet our ‘holier than thou’ churches remain either silent, or merely ‘tut-tut’ in the background.

It’s all too easy to blame holiday reps or club owners. But the Churches must shoulder much of the blame for the curse of this Magaluf Madness. 

Many mainstream churches have become cosy little middle class cliques, more interested in preserving their pious image of ‘look at us good wee Christian folk’ than actually following Christ’s example and tackling the needs of young people.

This has unfortunately spawned a generation of Pharisee churches throughout Ireland. The Pharisees were the notorious Biblical ultra-religious show-offs who liked to boast about their faith, but in reality it was just about image.

The Pharisee plague has contaminated too many churches across the Emerald Isle, where worshippers become obsessed with social activities, such as bowling clubs, treasure hunts, table quizzes and tractor pushes, but have no time for dealing with the sexual problems or challenges of young people.

Such Pharisee churches would rather lambast Ireland’s youth, preferring instead to brush such problems under the pulpit carpets, or indulge in mindless moralising rants.

Is it any wonder Ireland is steadily becoming a secular society as the influence of the churches constantly wanes? Such Pharisee churches have become the best ever adverts for atheism.

The churches need to return to the days when they provided wholesome entertainment for young people.

In my teens and twenties, checking the local weekly press for details of the ‘church parties’ was compulsive reading.

These church parties were held in church halls, Orange halls and community halls and were organised by local Christian churches and groups.

They were effectively supervised; there was no booze or dope; a usually woeful country group provided the music, and we played games such as ‘Farmer Wants A Wife’ and ‘Wheels of Troy’ for hours until nearly midnight.

This sounds boring compared to the mayhem on offer through Magaluf Madness, but hundreds of young people travelled to these packed halls every weekend – and all returned home safely at sensible hours.

The churches must begin working together to establish a return of this network of ‘church parties’ as an Irish rival to Magaluf Madness.

If the churches fail in this Christian duty, it’s only a matter of time before our young people return home – not to shocking social media footage going viral – but in coffins.

The pious in many churches seem very happy to give their cash to overseas causes, but turn a blind eye to needy Irish young people on their own front doorsteps.

These modern day Pharisees want all the praise for organising a fund-raising charity tractor push, but won’t actually lift a finger to help young people with drug, sex or drink-related problems.

Maybe the problem actually is that churches lack the skills, expertise, or knowledge to deal with such challenges, so forcing that young person to leave the church or community is the easy option.

If Irish churches continue to ignore the needs of our youth, how long before Africa, India and the other former Empire colonies start sending Christian missionaries to Ireland? That would be some shame!

Magaluf Madness

Radical Unionist commentator and former Blanket columnist Dr John Coulter comes from an evangelical Christian background. But in this latest article for The Pensive Quill he fires a shot across the bows of mainstream Christian Churches in Ireland for not doing enough to combat what he calls 'The Magaluf Madness.' A shorter version of this column appeared in the Irish Daily Star on 11th August, 2014. 

The scourge of the Magaluf Madness can only be cured by Ireland’s Christian Churches getting off their asses and into the communities they are supposed to serve.

Social media footage of an Irish girl allegedly performing oral sex on up to two dozen males in the sunspot has gone viral. 

Hardly a week goes by that social media does not unveil equally shocking images of sex romps at drink and drug-fuelled binges, yet our ‘holier than thou’ churches remain either silent, or merely ‘tut-tut’ in the background.

It’s all too easy to blame holiday reps or club owners. But the Churches must shoulder much of the blame for the curse of this Magaluf Madness. 

Many mainstream churches have become cosy little middle class cliques, more interested in preserving their pious image of ‘look at us good wee Christian folk’ than actually following Christ’s example and tackling the needs of young people.

This has unfortunately spawned a generation of Pharisee churches throughout Ireland. The Pharisees were the notorious Biblical ultra-religious show-offs who liked to boast about their faith, but in reality it was just about image.

The Pharisee plague has contaminated too many churches across the Emerald Isle, where worshippers become obsessed with social activities, such as bowling clubs, treasure hunts, table quizzes and tractor pushes, but have no time for dealing with the sexual problems or challenges of young people.

Such Pharisee churches would rather lambast Ireland’s youth, preferring instead to brush such problems under the pulpit carpets, or indulge in mindless moralising rants.

Is it any wonder Ireland is steadily becoming a secular society as the influence of the churches constantly wanes? Such Pharisee churches have become the best ever adverts for atheism.

The churches need to return to the days when they provided wholesome entertainment for young people.

In my teens and twenties, checking the local weekly press for details of the ‘church parties’ was compulsive reading.

These church parties were held in church halls, Orange halls and community halls and were organised by local Christian churches and groups.

They were effectively supervised; there was no booze or dope; a usually woeful country group provided the music, and we played games such as ‘Farmer Wants A Wife’ and ‘Wheels of Troy’ for hours until nearly midnight.

This sounds boring compared to the mayhem on offer through Magaluf Madness, but hundreds of young people travelled to these packed halls every weekend – and all returned home safely at sensible hours.

The churches must begin working together to establish a return of this network of ‘church parties’ as an Irish rival to Magaluf Madness.

If the churches fail in this Christian duty, it’s only a matter of time before our young people return home – not to shocking social media footage going viral – but in coffins.

The pious in many churches seem very happy to give their cash to overseas causes, but turn a blind eye to needy Irish young people on their own front doorsteps.

These modern day Pharisees want all the praise for organising a fund-raising charity tractor push, but won’t actually lift a finger to help young people with drug, sex or drink-related problems.

Maybe the problem actually is that churches lack the skills, expertise, or knowledge to deal with such challenges, so forcing that young person to leave the church or community is the easy option.

If Irish churches continue to ignore the needs of our youth, how long before Africa, India and the other former Empire colonies start sending Christian missionaries to Ireland? That would be some shame!

7 comments:

  1. Missionaries..Hell no.
    Turn the churches into Vodka factories, It was Good enough for Stalin. It's good enough for me.
    Perhaps that should be done with an Irish twist, and make them into Poitin stills instead.
    That should go some way to paying the National debt.
    Ban the church make Poitin legal.
    I have solved the economics.
    Everyone can have a lie-in.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The churches need to return to the days when they provided wholesome entertainment for young people.

    In my teens and twenties, checking the local weekly press for details of the ‘church parties’ was compulsive reading.

    These church parties were held in church halls, Orange halls and community halls and were organised by local Christian churches and groups.



    John these churches that provided wholesome entertainment for young people.. Is that were priests, vicars and men of the cloth groomed young men & girls for sex? The Orange halls are they the Orange halls were Willie McGrath and Tara preyed on kids or rompered innocent Catholics or where sectarian murders were planned?

    Why don't you take your Christian soldiers and stick them up your ass and give yourself a cheap thrill..

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  3. It's facile, happy-clappy shite like this that makes me want to start drinking again.

    Fuck it, I'm hitting the town of Magaluf, lads. Who's coming? The first round of tequila and the first kilo of coke are on me!

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  4. that sure got you going Alfie lol

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  5. Ha, ha, seems you got enmeshed Alfie in John's religious addiction!

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  6. Dr. Coulter, I used to read your posting on The Blanket and really enjoyed them.

    Sadly, Pandora is out of her box. Our world has changed so much and I haven't a clue on how to change it for the better.. But I thank you for at least trying..

    I won't apologize for the jerks who posted here. It is my PERSONAL opinion, they are part of the problem And I doubt any of them really understand how much they could help to make some positive changes. Sad.

    Have a great day Sir.

    ReplyDelete