Sean Mallory with his uncompromisingly wry take on recent events at home and abroad.

Well, it's been a few weeks since ‘our Lyra’ was cruelly taken from us and whose untimely demise has robbed and deprived the world of investigative journalism of another potential Mr Fisk or Mr Cockburn.

Lyra's ex-partner Sarah Canning, described the dissidents who accidently shot Lyra in a feat of reckless and irresponsibility bordering on complete stupidity, a trait that now seems to be genetic in Derry, as paedophiles by the way they groom kids ... a first of its kind in Norn Iron and a statement that tends to give the reader the impression that Sarah didn’t actually pen that herself but was repeating Establishment words.

Sarah, in her mourning and emotional pain, being in the spotlight and the current ‘darling’ of the media obviously feels she can make statements such as those of the paedophile nature without reprisal or response.....apparently paedophiles are up in arms at a dyke likening them to such.....#notinmynamedyke

Foster and her Neanderthals, once applauded in the Creggan by brain dead and blinkered muppets, have now retreated back to the boardrooms of Schomberg house to breath air free from the stench of cock munchers and pussy lickers, only to re-emerge with Orange collarettes to defend the union in the local and European Union elections.

Locally, the election of a DUP lesbian - Alison Bennington – has sparked brim fire and fury within the DUP ranks the likes of which hasn’t been seen since, since, since, well, I suppose not since Abraham after a bad acid trip, returned to his tribe with the news that he had been in communicado with a bloke called God.

‘Who?’

God, God - Abe repeated to the tribe and gesticulated by pointing to the sky.

Looking skyward in bewilderment the tribe responded among each other:

‘I don’t see anything, do you?

‘Who the fuck's this God bloke?’ was another common whisper.

Abe went on to deliver God's message that everyone was to slice their foreskins off to distinguish them as his people. At this point the tribe began to suspect that something was amiss with Abe......the rest they say is history!

The religious zealots and power makers of the DUP have publicly denounced their own party colleagues success and banned her from public speaking....which tends to be a slight handicap while holding public office. Others within the party have ever so slightly hinted that an opening rift within the party may be too far ruptured to mend. Leading one Free Presbyterian to liken it to... 'just as the curtain was rent in the temple’.

Foster on the other hand in having her party nominate Alison is hoping that this gesture of recognising the LGBT community will endear her to the other parties in their on-going Stormont talks and return her not only before the RHI report is published, not that she is that worried as she has no intention of resigning anyway, but that it will return her to work on the centenary celebrations of the British State of Northern Ireland coming up in 1922.

The UUP, that other once bastion of Ulster and Unionism continues to fade with a very poor result in both elections....not really much more to be said about it.

Alliance on the other hand is elated at its sudden success and likens itself to the rise of the Lib Dems across the water.

Who we remember as the party that blatantly betrayed it's supporters in its coalition with the Tories and was rewarded so in the British General election by being almost wiped out.....DUP Gavin Robinson must be watching over his shoulder!

The EU, an institution that Foster's boys abhor, but which they continually insist that the EU, 27 nation states with a combined approximate population of 500m people, should yield to the demands of a non-nation British province state with a minority of less than 1 million in favour of Brexit. Should the EU not comply then Foster and her DUP will be forced to continue to take their wages, expenses and pension until they repeat the same demand in a months time....the merry-go-around of Brexit.

Speaking of paedophiles, Louis Mountbatten's allegedly favourite trick, ‘granda again’ Prince Charles and his good lady Camilla were in town for a few days. Hopping back and forth across their imposed British border they have now visited Ireland for 5 years in row which to some people is causing them to think in spheres normally reserved for conspiracy theorists.

The Prince and his courtesan expressed their heartfelt hope for the restoration of the iconic Bank buildings after it was engulfed in an inferno and completely gutted. A hope shared by one local idiot (not from Derry this time) who likened its conflagration and decimation to that of Notre Dame's and expressed empathy with the people of Paris....WTF!

Primark – a retail outlet selling ‘affordable’ clothing based in Bank Buildings. A building just over 200 years old with a banal history.

Notre Dame – a medieval cathedral with over 600 years of European history, begun in 1163 and finished in 1345, a Paris landmark that is the most visited site by tourists in the world, approximately 13,000,000m a year, 30,000 a day.

You do the maths!

The relatives of Michael Leonard, aged 24, shot dead by RUC in 1973, were left somewhat dismayed and angry after the RUC, sorry the PSNI - so hard to tell the difference these days - first acknowledged that Michael was murdered by members of the RUC but only 24 hours later retracted their statement of ‘murdered’ with the explanation that the case had not yet been reviewed or reinvestigated by their Legacy Investigation branch so it couldn’t be described as murder.....cover up on the way. 

So, in following that legal logic, the reports of Lyra McKee's murder was in fact miss-leading as her investigation is continuing and so in fact she hasn’t been murdered either?

Staying locally...

George Best and TUV's Jim Alister both shared a commonality in ‘erections’. George having the erection of a bronze statue to honour him outside Elizabeth's family stadium. A statue that looks more like Pat Jennings than George!

George's sister has been reported as being distressed over such criticism and in response has criticised those who criticised George's statue or tried to belittle it with remarks and comments Best left in the gutter...a place where George frequented!

Jim on the other hand has seemingly been getting his phonetics mixed up or has been misheard and miss-understood due to his broad Ballymena accent. Much as Jonathan Ross (Woss) does.

He apparently has been over heard as brazenly referring to failures and successes in erections and not elections.... an issue that can afflict a lot of men but not something that cannot relieved by a ballet paper Jim...more likely to be resolved with Viagra.

Rory McIlroy has come out and declared he would gladly put the green jacket on for Ireland at the next Olympics. He has equated this with Ulster rugby players putting on the green jersey to play for Ireland.

But when one digs a little deeper one discovers that all is not as it seems. McIlroy, set on going to the Olympics, cannot play for team GB as Justin Rose holds that spot. He cannot play for his country of residence, USA, as he knows there are just too many choices in front of him and the Yanks would never have a Brit representing them at the Olympics so his only option is Ireland....it's all about me, isn’t Rory!

Across the water...

The British Prime Minister, Theresa May, resigned her post with what we initially assumed was her valedictory speech. Ending her speech in tears that sparked her husband's cry of ‘oh crikey’ she quickly about turned and headed back into 10 Downing Street to retain her residence until June 7th. Judging by her past experience of keeping her word it could be a case of calling the bailiffs after June 7th.

And finally...


Seamus Mallon launched his autobiography entitled ‘Wasn’t I A Smashing Weasel’. In his demented state, Mallon declared that the bedrock of democracy outlined in his Sunningdale for Slow Learners Agreement, 50 + 1 is the majority, is no longer apt for a border poll.

Mallon, like the SDLP in general, having recently abandoned their calls for a border poll and are simply echoing the mantra of their new political masters of Fianna Fáil and Mallon in particular, his past pay masters the British government.

Irrespective of how high esteem the media hold him in, one can draw succour from the fact that not many Nationalists actually pay much attention to the SDLP these days and we can see why!


Alzheimer's Through The Looking Glass.....

Sean Mallory with his uncompromisingly wry take on recent events at home and abroad.

Well, it's been a few weeks since ‘our Lyra’ was cruelly taken from us and whose untimely demise has robbed and deprived the world of investigative journalism of another potential Mr Fisk or Mr Cockburn.

Lyra's ex-partner Sarah Canning, described the dissidents who accidently shot Lyra in a feat of reckless and irresponsibility bordering on complete stupidity, a trait that now seems to be genetic in Derry, as paedophiles by the way they groom kids ... a first of its kind in Norn Iron and a statement that tends to give the reader the impression that Sarah didn’t actually pen that herself but was repeating Establishment words.

Sarah, in her mourning and emotional pain, being in the spotlight and the current ‘darling’ of the media obviously feels she can make statements such as those of the paedophile nature without reprisal or response.....apparently paedophiles are up in arms at a dyke likening them to such.....#notinmynamedyke

Foster and her Neanderthals, once applauded in the Creggan by brain dead and blinkered muppets, have now retreated back to the boardrooms of Schomberg house to breath air free from the stench of cock munchers and pussy lickers, only to re-emerge with Orange collarettes to defend the union in the local and European Union elections.

Locally, the election of a DUP lesbian - Alison Bennington – has sparked brim fire and fury within the DUP ranks the likes of which hasn’t been seen since, since, since, well, I suppose not since Abraham after a bad acid trip, returned to his tribe with the news that he had been in communicado with a bloke called God.

‘Who?’

God, God - Abe repeated to the tribe and gesticulated by pointing to the sky.

Looking skyward in bewilderment the tribe responded among each other:

‘I don’t see anything, do you?

‘Who the fuck's this God bloke?’ was another common whisper.

Abe went on to deliver God's message that everyone was to slice their foreskins off to distinguish them as his people. At this point the tribe began to suspect that something was amiss with Abe......the rest they say is history!

The religious zealots and power makers of the DUP have publicly denounced their own party colleagues success and banned her from public speaking....which tends to be a slight handicap while holding public office. Others within the party have ever so slightly hinted that an opening rift within the party may be too far ruptured to mend. Leading one Free Presbyterian to liken it to... 'just as the curtain was rent in the temple’.

Foster on the other hand in having her party nominate Alison is hoping that this gesture of recognising the LGBT community will endear her to the other parties in their on-going Stormont talks and return her not only before the RHI report is published, not that she is that worried as she has no intention of resigning anyway, but that it will return her to work on the centenary celebrations of the British State of Northern Ireland coming up in 1922.

The UUP, that other once bastion of Ulster and Unionism continues to fade with a very poor result in both elections....not really much more to be said about it.

Alliance on the other hand is elated at its sudden success and likens itself to the rise of the Lib Dems across the water.

Who we remember as the party that blatantly betrayed it's supporters in its coalition with the Tories and was rewarded so in the British General election by being almost wiped out.....DUP Gavin Robinson must be watching over his shoulder!

The EU, an institution that Foster's boys abhor, but which they continually insist that the EU, 27 nation states with a combined approximate population of 500m people, should yield to the demands of a non-nation British province state with a minority of less than 1 million in favour of Brexit. Should the EU not comply then Foster and her DUP will be forced to continue to take their wages, expenses and pension until they repeat the same demand in a months time....the merry-go-around of Brexit.

Speaking of paedophiles, Louis Mountbatten's allegedly favourite trick, ‘granda again’ Prince Charles and his good lady Camilla were in town for a few days. Hopping back and forth across their imposed British border they have now visited Ireland for 5 years in row which to some people is causing them to think in spheres normally reserved for conspiracy theorists.

The Prince and his courtesan expressed their heartfelt hope for the restoration of the iconic Bank buildings after it was engulfed in an inferno and completely gutted. A hope shared by one local idiot (not from Derry this time) who likened its conflagration and decimation to that of Notre Dame's and expressed empathy with the people of Paris....WTF!

Primark – a retail outlet selling ‘affordable’ clothing based in Bank Buildings. A building just over 200 years old with a banal history.

Notre Dame – a medieval cathedral with over 600 years of European history, begun in 1163 and finished in 1345, a Paris landmark that is the most visited site by tourists in the world, approximately 13,000,000m a year, 30,000 a day.

You do the maths!

The relatives of Michael Leonard, aged 24, shot dead by RUC in 1973, were left somewhat dismayed and angry after the RUC, sorry the PSNI - so hard to tell the difference these days - first acknowledged that Michael was murdered by members of the RUC but only 24 hours later retracted their statement of ‘murdered’ with the explanation that the case had not yet been reviewed or reinvestigated by their Legacy Investigation branch so it couldn’t be described as murder.....cover up on the way. 

So, in following that legal logic, the reports of Lyra McKee's murder was in fact miss-leading as her investigation is continuing and so in fact she hasn’t been murdered either?

Staying locally...

George Best and TUV's Jim Alister both shared a commonality in ‘erections’. George having the erection of a bronze statue to honour him outside Elizabeth's family stadium. A statue that looks more like Pat Jennings than George!

George's sister has been reported as being distressed over such criticism and in response has criticised those who criticised George's statue or tried to belittle it with remarks and comments Best left in the gutter...a place where George frequented!

Jim on the other hand has seemingly been getting his phonetics mixed up or has been misheard and miss-understood due to his broad Ballymena accent. Much as Jonathan Ross (Woss) does.

He apparently has been over heard as brazenly referring to failures and successes in erections and not elections.... an issue that can afflict a lot of men but not something that cannot relieved by a ballet paper Jim...more likely to be resolved with Viagra.

Rory McIlroy has come out and declared he would gladly put the green jacket on for Ireland at the next Olympics. He has equated this with Ulster rugby players putting on the green jersey to play for Ireland.

But when one digs a little deeper one discovers that all is not as it seems. McIlroy, set on going to the Olympics, cannot play for team GB as Justin Rose holds that spot. He cannot play for his country of residence, USA, as he knows there are just too many choices in front of him and the Yanks would never have a Brit representing them at the Olympics so his only option is Ireland....it's all about me, isn’t Rory!

Across the water...

The British Prime Minister, Theresa May, resigned her post with what we initially assumed was her valedictory speech. Ending her speech in tears that sparked her husband's cry of ‘oh crikey’ she quickly about turned and headed back into 10 Downing Street to retain her residence until June 7th. Judging by her past experience of keeping her word it could be a case of calling the bailiffs after June 7th.

And finally...


Seamus Mallon launched his autobiography entitled ‘Wasn’t I A Smashing Weasel’. In his demented state, Mallon declared that the bedrock of democracy outlined in his Sunningdale for Slow Learners Agreement, 50 + 1 is the majority, is no longer apt for a border poll.

Mallon, like the SDLP in general, having recently abandoned their calls for a border poll and are simply echoing the mantra of their new political masters of Fianna Fáil and Mallon in particular, his past pay masters the British government.

Irrespective of how high esteem the media hold him in, one can draw succour from the fact that not many Nationalists actually pay much attention to the SDLP these days and we can see why!


17 comments:

  1. The comparison between the "New" IRA, ISIS and white far right groups and grooming gangs and paedophile rings is perfectly apt. They all exploit the young, vulnerable and alienated with their simple persuasive but false narratives.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Call Mallon whatever names you like Mr Mallory but his analysis and prognosis for how partition might be addressed is far more realistic than anything I've heard from ubber-nationalists or republicans.

    Most reasonable folk will settle for a compromise rather than insisting on a triumph. Anyone with a brain in their head knows that a solution which doesn't address the Unionists' need for recognition, and retention, of their 'British identity' is fraught with danger.

    Thoughtful and decent people will be mindful of Wellington’s comment, as he beheld the dead and the dying after the battle of Waterloo, "the next worst thing to a great defeat is a great victory”.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Henry Joy - arguably the best leader SF never had, given their trajectory which followed in the trail he blazed. Have you read his book? It is very good. Fades at the end as he wants to give unionism even more power but overall quite good.

    ReplyDelete
  4. "arguably the best leader SF never had"

    Ha ha! I like it.

    No I haven't got my hands on his book yet ... probably wait for a library copy ... have read several recent articles appraising his contribution on the back of its publication and heard him on with Marian Finucane too.
    Much as I would have ridiculed Hume and Mallon in the past I have to concede, albeit now reading history backwards, that they were more admirable, consistent and realistic in their stances than we were as republicans.

    I understand your position about him wanting to give more power to Unionism and that his proposals can be interpreted as a form of minority rule. However, I think he's near enough on the money about how things will most likely evolve.

    Future generations, I believe, will remember Hume and Mallon for their decency and integrity, McGuinness and Adams somewhat differently.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Henry Joy - the sheer moral courage of the guy; the unrelenting stance against the security services; he paints a horrifying picture of what life was like in Armagh for nationalists. History proved the SDLP so right that SF became them

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mallon led a charmed life for his 'sheer moral courage'. Residing in an area that was full of UDR and RUC plus the glenanne gang and yet he never got the treatment that other uppity taigs got. One wonders. Others who were unrelenting against the security forces were not so fortunate for eg Rosemary Nelson. Truth be told Mallon and his ilk were great propaganda tools for the state I.e they were held aloft as an example as to how 'decent' Catholics should behave and be obedient wee subjects.
      Out of interest, does he reveal how arrogant and nasty a headmaster he was, in his new book? Also don't be fooled into thinking he was popular despite his poll triumphs over the years. The peasants are cute hoors down around his neck of the woods.
      P.s history didn't prove the SDLP right, rather it proved that the SF leadership was wrong.

      Delete
  6. "13,000,000m a year, 30,000 a day.

    You do the maths!"

    Should have left the 'm' out Sean, otherwise you are really implying that 13 million million people (1.3e x 13) have visted Notre Dame...which might make it a teensy wee bit crowded and is a shitload more that 30k a day!

    But that Geordie Best statue was a disgrace, that ugly it could have been an homage to the female Sinn Fein Women Leadership group. Now there's an erection killer!
    You do the math!

    ReplyDelete
  7. AM - Painful and all as it is for many to contemplate how Adams and Co. managed that transition, its also challenging all considered, to imagine how Northern society might have been extricated differently or any more successfully from the morass which it had descended into.

    The one thing I disagree most with Mallon about, when I reflect on SF's transition, is his contention that Adams played Hume like a trout: I think it was more a case of Hume letting Adams believe he was playing him (Adams was the one that moved, whilst Hume remained pretty much consistent in his stance).

    I'm also of an opinion that Seamus still harbours a resentment of sorts with Hume. He (Seamus) it seems hasn't reconciled himself fully to Hume's single-minded commitment to achieving an end to violence; an unqualified single-minded commitment even if it meant the ceding of the SDLP's electoral dominance to SF.

    Mallon's resentment often leaks out when he frames Hume's single-minded vision as that of "John's ego". Seamus rolls out this old chestnut time and time again. Yet, save but from him, we seldom hear others voice such criticism of Hume?

    That aside though, and as you rightly say, he was a courageous man in very difficult and dangerous times and is worthy of recognition and respect for his lifetime of service and leadership.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Henry Joy - the balance of forces and narrow band of opportunity was always going to push it in this direction. Jake Jackson once referred to the baseline common sense position of Northern nationalism which SF was always being pulled towards. I found it a useful phrase. That was always a gravitational pull. Ending the war was the right choice. Delaying its end so that political careers could be built is what probably annoys Mallon. He never had anybody killed to get to become Deputy First Minister, unlike Martin McGuinness.

    Mallon is pretty gracious in the book towards Hume. He thinks he erred but admits they were both strong personalities. One of the endearing things about the book is that Mallon is self-effacing about his own.

    I think he is less resentful about Hume sacrificing the SDLP for peace and perhaps more for the type of peace the North ultimately got with two gangs of shysters running the show, their hatreds and self interests not left outside. His refusal to cede to Hume any right to do things internally undemocratically is admirable.

    If he think's Hume had an ego problem it is a fair comment to make. Hume not being criticised is less down to intellectual honesty but a regime of silence built around him. Mallon did not buy into that. That is not to unduly denigrate Hume but to flag up the need for stronger culture of freedom of inquiry. Read the book if you get a chance. But the health warning always goes with (even if it does not come with) autobiographies. They are susceptible to tendentiousness.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for your responses AM.
      Taking the health warning on board it still sounds like a worthwhile read. We'll continue when I've it read.

      Delete
  9. Wolfe Tone

    Because Seamus Mallon did not end up with a bullet in his head or a bomb underneath his car does not detract from his fearless condemnation of the actions of state forces and his determination to get to the bottom of the "shoot to kill" epiosodes in County Armagh and elsewhere. He also fearlessly condemned all acts of violence by armed groups and made a point of attendiong as many wakes and funerals of victims. Although, i guess in your books that makes him an "obedient wee subject". A contemptible post.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Barry/Wolfe Tone, while having disagreed with him back in the day, I wish I had his courage.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anthony

      You have displayed courage in spades in standing up for freedom of speech and calling out the totalitarianism and intellectual dishonesty of the Provisionals. I speaks as soneone who has disagreements with you and as a former SDLP activist would have been your polar opposite back in the day.

      Delete
  11. Seamus Mallon is an intelligent educated man and yet he failed to call out what was happening in the north. Be it unionist death squads or so called shoot to kill cops, these episodes were straight out of Kitsons handbook on counterinsurgency and yet Mallon peddled Jack hermons and others line that it was a few 'rogue apples'.
    Put it this way, when father Raymond Murray was pointing out these facts, allthewhile being isolated by the church, Mallon hadn't got his back. A croppies lie down politician if ever there was one. It doesn't surprise me that Gilheany admires such a trait.

    ReplyDelete
  12. WT - That would not be my memory of Seamus Mallon but my memory is now so poor I don't really remember a lot of his discourse around that. His book is frightening because he says the exact opposite of what you feel he said. Does not exonerate the state in the slightest. He was anything but a croppies lie down man which is what makes the end of his book jar so much with rest of it because the case he makes for parallel consent is one that will with justification be viewed as a call for Croppies to lie down

    ReplyDelete
  13. AM, Mallon of course condemned State terrorism although he never coined it like that but he inevitably levelled the same condemnation against republicans, often in the same sentence. This allowed him to appear 'balanced' and neutral in the conflict. In hindsight, it is stark his resentment of the republican movement and if my memory is correct he was often, via the media, very hardline towards SF during the GFA negotiations. Is his resentment bourne from the fact the shinners have replaced the stoops in the pecking order? If it is then he is indeed a petty man. P.s the image of brid Rodgers jumping up and down when the GFA was agreed has often got me wondering; was she jumping at the prospect of peace or the prospect that the stoops had hit the stormont jackpot. Maybe I am a bit harsh; she probably jumped for both!

    ReplyDelete
  14. WT - he has every right to criticise the Republican Movement if he felt they needed it. Just as we have the right to criticise him. He was not a member and at the heel of the hunt the Republican Movement came over to his position which gives his criticisms of it even greater power. He simply did not think anyone should die. Not a bad position to hold. He was critical of SF during the GFA and peace process because he felt SF was going to replace the SDLP and do a poor job of it. Few of us will find him wrong on that. He felt the SDLP and UUP were the best combination to protect the GFA. Was he envious and resentful? Perhaps/probably but his foibles in that regard are hardly any worse than those the rest of us have. In the end the SDLP argument won out.

    ReplyDelete