Anthony McIntyre ⚽ Long considered detritus among European soccer nations, the Belgian national side eventually emerged from the shadow of European greats and produced its own Golden generation.
Problem was that it never did find the Midas touch. Like Tantalus, a trophy was always just in front of it but never quite within reach. Their fans hoped they might have hit the purple patch that Spain cruised on for 6 years after a prolonged spell on the margins. It wasn't to be, and Les Diables Rouges really have been the window shoppers on the World and European Hight Street.
Having just watched them slog out a 0-0 draw with Ukraine, the thing that puzzled me most on the cusp of my 68th year on this planet, was how I did not fall asleep watching the encounter. People have long quipped about boring Belgian businessmen or boring Brussels bureaucrats. When I would speak with my late great friend TC about heading out to see him in Brussels where he staffed Sinn Fein's European office for a while in the 90s, he would give me a quizzical look, wondering why anybody would want to visit the city. His suggestion was that I go out to Amsterdam and that would be an excuse for him to escape boring Brussels for a while. In the end it didn't happen and he arrived back in Belfast where his sense of mischief had not been dulled by the Belgian capital.
My own time in Brussels was short lived, one night. Myself and Tommy McKearney had journeyed to the city by car from Hamburg. Once we crossed the border with Germany I slept most of the remainder of the trip. It was as if I had been bitten by the bore bug. From a Television studio to a hotel to our flight - that was the sum of it.
I thought of TC while watching today's game. The one word that sprang to mind was boredom. If there is such a dance as the Tedium Tango, it was executed with a perfect ten. Scoreless in Stuttgart, if made into a movie would just be a blank screen. While Sleepless in Seattle is still remembered as a film Scoreless in Stuttgart should be forgotten about by the end of the tournament but probably wouldn't. The most boring European Cup final I ever remember, poses a conundrum I can just about figure out. How I still remember it when it was so ennui saturated is best explained by a paradox: the only reason I recall it is that it was such a bore. A bad experience that causes flashbacks. No points for guessing that it too had a Belgian connection. FC Bruges played Liverpool at Wembley in 1978. It was as boring as being on the blanket, more even. Imagine had the NIO copped on and put TVs in the cells and played that match over and over again, the blanket protest would have collapsed.
This evening, I thought at first I had erred by having a can of Bud as I watched, feeling that something stronger would have dulled the senses. I half considered a whiskey as I was not about to waste Tequila on it. In the end, I stayed with the Bud, one tin as much as I was willing to squander.
My son asked me after the game if I thought Belgium would do well in the knock out stages. I explained that there is no reason to think they can do well. Yet because that can be said of most teams in the knock out stages, some of them have to progress, a case of doing well without playing well. This tournament has thrown up that phenomenon already with England, Italy and France. Spain, who have played exciting football, can't be expected to end all their runs. One flat side will have to cancel out another flat side in a boring process of elimination. Austria, Switzerland and Slovenia might offer something of an antidote, the patent certain to be snapped up by pharmaceutical companies for use against the tsetse fly.
This is not the World Cup, the latter a tournament where no surprise package lands on the top of the tree. Since 1992 Denmark, Greece and Portugal have all refused to stay in their lanes, blazing their way to the winner's podium.
Even with that history, it would take something akin to a miracle to see a blazing Belgium.
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