James Kearney shares a letter he penned to Bobby Sands in April 2006.
 
Mo chara, I still think of you with love and affection after all these long years. In many ways I feel disconnected since you left in May 1981. It's been, and still is, a strange feeling.

I still think a lot about that day in February 1981 when we met for the last time at Sunday mass in the canteen: when we shook hands and you, more or less, bade goodbye to each of us that morning. What a feeling! If I could, mo chara, I would bring you back to life, so all of this pain and inner sorrow, which at times plights my life, could end.

I have to tell you that when you died (the Dark, Brendan Hughes, shouted the news down the wing that morning), I didn't cry, but silently thought to myself that you had escaped Criminalisation and had left us to face the battle on our own. A selfish thought I suppose. But now, in the fullness of time, I realise that in death you and the boys broke our chains and forever set us free. And for that, I am eternally grateful.

I have tried to live a good life, one which would make you proud. The values which we shared in the H Blocks - honour, brotherhood, integrity, courage and grit determination, I still aspire to in civilian life. My reference point has always been the Blanket protest in the H Blocks and the lessons learnt then have guided me ever since.

Sometimes when I am in bed during the stillness of the night, I can hear you speak to my heart. And there are times I feel your presence so close to me that I reach out to touch you. It's not so strange, I tell myself, because wasn't it you who told us not to worry about death? For rebels like us never really die - we live on in the hearts and minds of those we have touched on this earth.

Growing tired again mo chara, it's late and another day dawns. Looking forward to the day when I will see your face again. So until then, keep watching over me and give me the strength to carry on.

Love, Seamus. xxx

Bobby Sands

Seamus Kearney

⏩ James Kearney is a former Blanketman.
 

A Letter To Bobby

James Kearney shares a letter he penned to Bobby Sands in April 2006.
 
Mo chara, I still think of you with love and affection after all these long years. In many ways I feel disconnected since you left in May 1981. It's been, and still is, a strange feeling.

I still think a lot about that day in February 1981 when we met for the last time at Sunday mass in the canteen: when we shook hands and you, more or less, bade goodbye to each of us that morning. What a feeling! If I could, mo chara, I would bring you back to life, so all of this pain and inner sorrow, which at times plights my life, could end.

I have to tell you that when you died (the Dark, Brendan Hughes, shouted the news down the wing that morning), I didn't cry, but silently thought to myself that you had escaped Criminalisation and had left us to face the battle on our own. A selfish thought I suppose. But now, in the fullness of time, I realise that in death you and the boys broke our chains and forever set us free. And for that, I am eternally grateful.

I have tried to live a good life, one which would make you proud. The values which we shared in the H Blocks - honour, brotherhood, integrity, courage and grit determination, I still aspire to in civilian life. My reference point has always been the Blanket protest in the H Blocks and the lessons learnt then have guided me ever since.

Sometimes when I am in bed during the stillness of the night, I can hear you speak to my heart. And there are times I feel your presence so close to me that I reach out to touch you. It's not so strange, I tell myself, because wasn't it you who told us not to worry about death? For rebels like us never really die - we live on in the hearts and minds of those we have touched on this earth.

Growing tired again mo chara, it's late and another day dawns. Looking forward to the day when I will see your face again. So until then, keep watching over me and give me the strength to carry on.

Love, Seamus. xxx

Bobby Sands

Seamus Kearney

⏩ James Kearney is a former Blanketman.
 

7 comments:

  1. An incredibly moving and touching piece thank you for sharing this Mr Kearney

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  2. A lovely tribute from the heart. Thank you Seamus They often say time heals ... we have just passed Joe mc Donnells anniversary and in a few day we will be acknowledging Martin Hurson ,then we will remember Kevin , Kieran , Thomas and Michael. The bravest of the brave. Harrowing times, we marched all over the 6 counties and the free state for years to raise awareness to the plight of the blanket men and women. I remember the Gardai beating us of the streets at the British Embassy in Balls Bridge in Dublin in 1981 , making my way back up to Tyrone thinking how callous and indifferent the 26 county establishment were to our predicament. Blessed are those who hunger for justice.

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  3. Powerful stuff, this was a tear jerker. I like your writing style Seamus-short, to the point, haunting but always thought provoking.

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  4. A very touching piece to read and he was 100% correct the rebel never dies but lives on forever more in every Irishman and Irishwoman born

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  5. Anthony, this is a touching tribute, even though I see things quite differently from James.

    It raises an issue I have pondered for some time, but never asked about. What proportion of the IRA were believers in the God of Christianity? How many died expecting God to receive their souls in peace? Did they believe the Catholic teaching about God, or had they their own ideas about how to inherit eternal life?

    Or was their belief in the afterlife a metaphor for thinking we cease to exist when we die, with only our name living on in people's memories?

    On the surface, it seems they were not being metaphorical in their religious profession of faith. That the gold crucifixes the hunger-strikers held at their end actually meant they expected to continue to exist and be with God when they died.

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    1. Ian - it depended on location. In the cages, very few attended mass. In the blocks we all did during the blanket protest as it was the only time to get out of the cell and talk to each other face to face. There was a lot of religiosity during the blanket protest but that dropped seriously after the end of the protest. Very few at mass. But you make a good point about them not being metaphorical in their faith. I think they genuinely embraced it. Some of them who did embrace it then are now serious atheists. I think on our wing throughout the protest I was the only affirmed atheist but I might be wrong. I just can't remember anyone else. I remember discussions with the priest on metaphysics and predetermination in 79. We were discussing Marx, Feurbach, Diderot, Hegel, evolution. He had a great allegorical tale for evolution of which he was firm believer. He later asked other prisoners if I was being listened to on the wing!!!
      I agree, they did expect to continue to exist in some afterlife.

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  6. Thanks, Anthony. That fills it a significant bit of the Republican puzzle for me.

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