From Prison To Pulpit ➖ Bobby Mathieson

Belfast Telegraph ✈ Ex-UVF man Bobby Mathieson on his path to redemption: 'I told myself I was evil, that I'd be better off dead but God saved me'

Gail Walker

From prison to pulpit: The first of three interviews with ex-terrorists who have found God to varying degrees. Former UVF man Bobby Mathieson opens up about the mental torture he endured after he took a life and his path to redemption.

For Bobby Mathieson, being part of a UVF gang that murdered a Catholic man eventually left him wanting to kill himself.

Ten years into his life sentence in the Maze, the back-slapping camaraderie with fellow paramilitaries had worn thin.

Studying maths and art A-levels was a fulfilling distraction, but when he closed the books and put away his canvas, he would paint a mental picture of his own life - and the sum total was worthless.

Playing football allowed him to show off the silky skills that had seen him signed as a teenager by Linfield and, outwardly, his sporting prowess added to his status as one of the big personalities of the H-blocks, full of character and banter. But inside, in his own head, he felt small, despairing and empty - and increasingly that vacuum was filled with a deep self-loathing.

Continue reading @ Belfast Telegraph.